That GIF is a pretty accurate reflection of me thinking about and then failing at box jumps.
When you have never really been fit. When you have zero core. When you have no balance. Basically, every exercise is a challenge. But, box jumps see impossible.
Getting over the embarrassment of being the least fit person in a class – it really is tough. I don’t know that I ever will.
Saturdays at Crossfit are completely different than class during the week. At 5:30 am Monday – Friday, there are usually 3-7 other people. Though I am still incredibly self-conscious (especially when my shirt is too short for a move), I feel like, for the most part, these people have accepted that I am there and trying. I have started to know them, and, honestly, they are all incredibly encouraging. (I’d be lying if I said these Saturday people weren’t encouraging, because they are. But, it is still a different story.)
But Saturdays (and this is only my second), there are maybe 30-40 people or more. And, they are all incredibly fit. A few you wouldn’t be surprised to see on a fitness or muscle magazine. Today, we had warm ups, then a weight thing where you have a dumbell in one hand, and you go down in front with a leg counterbalancing in back. Balancing – which I have none of. I did it – poorly. But, making strides.
Then we were supposed to get in groups of three to do a series of five exercises “waterfall” style (I think that’s it). One person does the first exercise, finishes, moves to the second, and then the second does the first and so on. You can’t start until the person in front of you finishes. And, one of the exercises it the box jump.
I’m doing some of that cat math above thinking I am going to be the weakest link, I can’t do the same weights, and I certainly can’t do the box jump. Everyone starts grouping up. And, this really fit woman addresses me and another guy and says do you guys need partners.
I have to be honest. I acted as if I was sure she was not addressing me. I absolutely did not want to be part of a group. I am embarrassed enough doing it on my own. I did not want people to be forced to watch my pathetic performance.
So I did it on my own. And, while everyone grabbed the 2′ x 3′ boxes and put them up at the 3′ jump level, on my own, I grabbed a little box 1′ x 2′ and put it on the 1′ size knowing I’d have to use it as a step, not a jump.
As we started, today’s coach, Dan, saw me doing the cat math – thinking in front of the box and encouraged me to try. After considering whether my weight might actually break the box if I tried, I did try it. A few times. Over the course of 4 sets, I had 20 opportunities. And, though I had to do the cat math each time, I managed to jump on, both feet at the same time, probably 10 times.
There was no way in hell I was ever going to be able to do it. And, I did!
Pathetic – a little 1′ jump – I know. But, I have to say, I am still a bit proud.
I am glad that the coach had a little more faith in me than I did myself.