I want immediate results. Don’t we all. But, I have been a very heavy guy all of my life. And, though I have been a “healthy fat” a few times in my life, I have never been truly fit.
So, for me, the long term perspective means swallowing my pride and recognizing that I cannot keep up – yet. Not getting so disappointed that I give up.
Today, we had to do lunges with a kettlebell in one arm kind of up at your shoulder. I already had to swallow some pride because I was using the lightest kettlebell. Look around and everyone is using far heavier weights. But, part of the way into my first set, the coach had to stop me. I have s&%t for balance and he tells me that I have to work on my form, and that I should work on it with no weight. Swallow your pride.
But, even still, with no weight, I couldn’t get to that 90 degrees that they want out of me. So he grabs a band, throws it over a pull up bar, and tells me to use that to get the motion down right. Swallow your pride. After moving my hand positions further and further up the band for more leverage, I was starting to get the motion.
I am trying to tell myself that a 180 pound person using a 50 pound kettlebell for lunges may have a total load less than a 285 pound guy just lifting his own body weight. That’s my lame attempt at retaining some pride. But, unfortunately, I have to use that band.
So, I am trying to take the very long term perspective that I will get there some day. For now, I’ll aim for no weights and no bands and try to ignore the fact that I will be the weakest, least balanced, most out of shape person. For now.
(I did survive a dinner at Fogo de Chao without screwing up too bad and had a great time at one of our City’s best events last night – Taste of Alpharetta – and just ate healthy foods in the right proportions. It’s slowly (very slowly) becoming less about food being the main focus for me, but I feel like I am making the right decisions.)